Dr Stuart's Liver Detox

Today I'm going to talk about heroes. Heroes are important, I think. They have been instrumental in my self-construction of the person I am today. I suppose a lot of things have, such as the industrialisation and exploitative commercialisation of the dairy industry, the cancellation of Firefly, and my Mac's ability to scroll through inactive windows.

Heroes aren't players that score a game-winner before the buzzer, or who dive in front of someone to take the bullet. Heroes are the defenders who prevent goals consistently by locking out a potentially scoring player from getting involved. Heroes are the educators who teach people about smoke alarms and to stop drop and roll. People involved with prevention and mitigation are the most important, the 'heroes' just get all the glory when it was a team effort from the start. Heroes are often not the people you expect. Who would have thought a lowly astromech droid such as R2-D2 would become arguably the most important figure in a galaxy far, far away?

Let's take a moment to appreciate what support bars do for us. [1]

This brings me to todays tea: Dr Stuart's Liver Detox. This was given to me by a chum(p) known as Sam. She described it as 'gross', or something. I don't remember exactly what she said. The important thing, is that she gave it to me for free. The point is, heroes can sometimes be critics, who tell you what not to do. Roger Ebert is someone I consider a hero, he always knew whether or not a film would be wasting my life. We only get a short time in this life, why waste it on things that aren't worth your time? Especially if you have the luxury of choice; not many do, you'd be crazy to waste your opportunity. I'm not saying I'm a hero for reviewing tea, but I'm not saying I'm not one either.

Something tells me I'm going to want to detox this as soon as I taste it.

What the hell is that smell?:
Oh shit, I'm going to go open my door and make sure I have ventilation in this room. Oh god. The same rules apply here as they do when cleaning with bleach and ammonia together. It smells like burning tires, and what I imagine Bubblegloop Swamp to smell like. Ingredients: Dandelion root, centaury herb and milk thistle. Oh god. What have I done?

I picked a lot of thistles in my 500 hours of Skyrim. Worth iiiiiiit.

Tentative first taste:
I really don't want to try this. Interesting fact: While waiting for the tea to cool, I was googling the milk thistle, like the ones I used to pick in Skyrim. The Milk thistle actually cause death to ruminants (cows, sheep, your mum) via oxygen deprivation due to levels of potassium nitrate metabolites binding to haemoglobin, blocking oxygen binding and the red blood cells' ability to transport oxygen. 

Okay Ben, just do it. You can do it. Brb. Okay fine. I can do this.



Oh fuck. This is the worst thing I've ever drank. I have tears in my eyes. My face is screwed up, oh my god. All my saliva is tainted! I don't care about my liver anymore; I want tequila to wash this down. Here is a video I have made of my initial reaction. 

Somebody kill me please:
Do not drink this. Curse you Sam. A plague on your house. You are the opposite of a hero. Nothing could have prepared me for this.


No:



Horses:
[1] http://www.pmrr.org/Structures/BasculeBridge/photo09.jpg